Saturday, January 8, 2011
I am out of rhythm these days. I stop and start. There is no flow. It feels jerky. Unsettled. Thoughts are mixed in my mind. They elude capture. The thing about lacking rhythm is that there is nothing to do but live in the moment. To live with whatever presents itself. But I find that the moment feels edgy and sharp when there is no rhythm. The moment begs for peace, for flow, for a sense of stability.
Rhythm requires will and self-discipline. But in the midst of out-of-rhythm comes a weak will and no desire to discipline oneself. It is the paradox of rhythm. No rhythm reinforces no rhythm. Rhythm reinforces rhythm.
Upon reflection, I realize that I do have a rhythm. But it is of the kind that reaches into old habits, old ways of thinking, old ways of doing, unproductive ways, unhealthy ways. I suppose when I have had enough, I will make the jump into a rhythm of healing and peace.
I think that leap must be made today, always today.
Posted by Lisa Gonzales-Barnes